Tag: 上海夜生活网

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grdjzx

Sit in

In the leisurely afternoon, I sat by the window facing the autumn wind to stretch my freehand brushwork mood. Pour a cup of fragrant tea and look for yesterday’s footprints in thinking; Taste the taste of missing in the teacup; Dance my thoughts on the keyboard! In a flash, it is another autumn. How time flies! Seeing that it was already 30 years old, the counting of more than 1,000 days and nights passed away between opening eyes and closing eyes! Lamenting that time flies like an arrow and the moon flies like a shuttle, and at the same time, I am confused and working hard for the unknown tomorrow! In a flash, another year. One year’s time was depressed in my eyes in the blink of an eye, while those memories were still clearly left in my mind. I still remember that in the late autumn one year ago, the gift I had been looking forward to has not been received so far, and there were too many memories buried in that late autumn. The expectations of those days and nights were deeply scratched by the feet of time. Playing with the keyboard in front of the screen, I accumulated countless words! A year passed in a blink of an eye. However, in this blink of an eye time tunnel, what kind of mental journey has been experienced and what kind of price has been paid, and only oneself can feel the taste. However, everything cannot be measured by time! I thought everything had been frozen in the deep sea and thrown out of the clouds… only to be locked in the box of love! Everything is still clearly engraved on our small tablet. What else is there except touching me? What can we do besides sticking to that belief? Because I still remember that little promise, I will always look forward to it! I don’t want much, just a little. How much can my heart hold! All the unpleasant things in the past let it disappear in the wind with the dust, leaving those happy times around to inspire every day in the future. After that, we will expect with gratitude and generosity. Maybe three or five years; Maybe ten or eight years later, we will still be like this, and our hearts will still be on the other side like now! Perhaps, there are too many unknowns. As long as we cherish the time we have today, we will not be lonely any more even if we become lonely in the future. At least we will live with our memories in our hearts. Month year-over-year blink. Sometimes we sigh that time is too fast because of the sunshine overhead! Often, many things have not been completed in time, and many things have not yet been realized. Every month, every year, we have already bypassed the circle after circle! Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Cduchha

Unloading

She, a clown, a clown with makeup removed. She was in the backstage of the performance. She fell off the makeup table of another clown, hid from those fluffy wigs, pinched those red nose balls and pulled those clothes of different colors, I stepped on those big masks. He didn’t drink, but scolded those funny and lovely clowns on the stage. Vicious, very vicious! She turned a few handsome somersaults, grinned Red big mouth, shook the lovely pointed hat, shook the clever curling boots, clown, this is her. The audience who clapped their hands and laughed, the sound was higher than the sound. Her past is so clear in her memory. Give happiness to others, but leave pain to yourself. After happiness is filtered, there is only a full night! The scattered Hall fell down, and only myself was empty, and the Echo accompanied me! She is just a clown without makeup! Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Locqbb

No

[Introduction] it is said on the Internet that iron leaves can clear away heat and toxic materials. Is it because people gradually discovered the medicinal value of iron leaves that they began to grow universally? I always keep an eye on where there are iron trees when I am heartless. In the past, if someone asked me what my favorite plant was, I would answer that it was flowers. But now, I may tell you: it is an iron tree. Because iron leaf is an essential medicine in father’s traditional Chinese medicine. I have never paid so much attention to the iron tree as I do now. This kind of plant, which was rare several years ago, began to be widely planted at some time. In the park, in the flower bed of the community, its shadow can be seen almost everywhere on the street. Its universal existence provides convenience for us to dispense medicine by ourselves. Every day, a piece of iron leaf should be broken off as the guide of medicine. The iron leaves are emerald green and soft at the beginning of their growth, and then they will turn dark green with imperceptible thorns. Each leaf consists of many slender and pointed small leaves. If you don’t pay attention, you may be stabbed. Nevertheless, I still think this kind of plant is very cute. It is said on the Internet that iron leaves can clear away heat and toxic materials. Is it because people gradually discovered the medicinal value of iron leaves that they began to grow universally? I always keep an eye on where there are iron trees when I am heartless. I even had a very naive idea that my father used iron leaves every day, and one day there would be no iron leaves. But when I saw the iron tree giving birth to new leaves, it was Clusters, and its growth speed was also fast, I felt relieved. The iron tree stands quietly in the soil every day, showing a piece of emerald green, stretching leaves, enduring the scorching sun in summer, and bringing people a little shade. People always like to describe the difficulty of a thing with iron trees blooming and dumb words. In reality, I have never seen an iron tree with flowers blooming. But I think even if there is no flowering iron tree in the world, there will be miracles. And I hope that some miracles are related to the iron tree. My favorite Iron Tree, don’t escape from my eyes, let me see with my own eyes how you participate in creating miracles. Like (prose editor: prose online) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Ftmiiedrr

Hair old

Children are always a little picky when eating. Every time they eat, Lao Tang (in fact, Lao Tang is not really old, and he is younger than me, but everyone is used to calling him Xiao Tang when calling his son) he always told his son to eat some of every dish. He was an absolute authoritative parent, and his son Xiao Tang was indeed afraid of him, sometimes I really don’t want to eat the dishes, looking pitifully at his father swallowing them with tears. In particular, Xiao Tang was relatively delicate and often hung water. When he felt uncomfortable, his child was depressed and listless when he ate. He didn’t want to eat but was afraid of his father, he always looked at his father pitifully. When eating this day, I saw Xiao Tang’s spirit was good. Sweet and sour pork ribs were his favorite. He moved the plate in front of him and mixed the rice with red and sticky pork ribs soup, eating with relish. At this time, Lao Tang said: Yang Yang, do you still have so-and-so food? Xiaotang squinted a little bit with chopsticks obediently, frowned and looked at his father chewing vegetables pitifully, saying: then I will report every dish I eat in the future! It made us laugh happily. The child was very clever and clever. At this time, my colleague Xiao Chen said: Old Tang, now your son listens to you, and will fight with you in another two years. Resistance? When he asked me for this, he would always be obedient. Lao Tang smiled and twisted his thumb and index finger with each other. Colleague Xiao Chen also asked Xiao Tang with his fingers twisting like old Tang: Yang Yang, do you know what your father’s action means? I don’t know yet, old Mao! Xiao Tang answered neatly. It deserves to be the offspring of the party! Colleagues ji zan word. Because Lao Tang is a party member. In addition to 100 yuan, 50 yuan is also Mao old man. Old Tang said. That good? Colleague Xiao Chen quickly took out money from his pocket to see, oh, it’s true. It seems that you only earn money, not often. The meal was quickly finished during the chatting and laughing. All I know is that money flows out of my hand like running water. Except for the one with 100 yuan, I know it is old Mao, because it is often necessary to distinguish the authenticity of money, the rest really didn’t pay attention to the character’s head portrait on the money. Hearing what they said today, I also found out all kinds of bills of face value, and found that no matter it was 5 yuan, 10 yuan or 20 yuan, even 1 yuan bills were old man Mao, it’s just that the color of the old man Mao with different denomination notes is different, and the power is really powerful. Chairman Mao, the great leader of a generation, led the Chinese people to turn over and become the master. We should remember him. No one dislikes money. It is easy to do things with money. There is a saying that money can make the hell go wrong. Sometimes a penny can beat the hero. Nowadays, it is really hard to move without money. If everyone can remember him, know him and love him, I am afraid that printing his head on the money is the best way. However, we must remember that only when a gentleman loves him can he get it properly. Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Locqbb

把过

毕业季,整理书架上的专业书,竟翻出一本蓝皮的笔记本,有些陈旧,却并没沾染尘埃,好奇,是满溢的情绪,至此,记下二十余载光华,原来,我曾遇见你。 潘婼悕 (一) 六岁,九月,丹桂在落泪。 和所有孩子一样,开始知道有 学校 这么个地方,书包、水壶、雨靴和伙伴。童年,在十年后的今天,记忆是凋落的丹桂,只采撷几片,夹成书签,沾染些文气,然后放进嘴里,咀嚼成碎片,咽入喉咙,穿过食道,直至胃里。 那年,最盼望的莫过于中饭的时光,和小朋友一起,把幼儿园内的桌子,几张搬到一处,排排坐,或拿出一早备好的便当,或等着家长来送饭,比较着谁的菜色更为丰富和可口。我是不晓得自己的便当里有些什么的,因为清晨妈妈在准备的时候我总在吃早饭,等伙伴来邀一起去学校,但依稀记得,每天,嫩黄嫩黄的煎蛋是必不可少的。听说,半熟的煎蛋可以养出音乐家的嗓音,可惜到了我这,估计什么效果都没有了,至今仍是五音不全,跑调到了西伯利亚。等天气再冷一些,就会家长集体来送了,这个 工作 多半是母亲来做的。我比较特殊,不是母亲也不是奶奶,每次都是外婆,父亲更是极少来的,因而那时与母亲的关系是更为亲近的。 长大后,懂事后,和父亲的交流提升了层次后,才发觉我们之间似有更多的共同点,都说,父亲是女儿前世的情人,我总爱开父亲的玩笑: 哈,老潘同志,好福气啊,前世有我这样的情人。 这时的我总会挨上一记额头上的敲打,不重不轻,恰到好处,暖暖的疼痛。每每都闻到厨房里饭菜特有的香味,或是鱼被爆炒的焦味,或是翻炒包菜的吱吱声,伴着橘黄色的灯光,会不自觉地笑,那种光暖是之后在外都感受不到的,以至脆弱时想起,总红了眼睛。 有次,我们都在吃着自己的便当,有个叫 明 的小朋友还没等到他的午餐,大家都瞪大了眼睛注视着门口,那是绿色的油漆过的门,现在多半都见不到这样老式的门了。终于,看见他奶奶收起雨伞,将饭盒递了过来,所有人欢欣了起来,气氛也一下子活跃了起来,大家边说边笑边扒饭。 十年后再遇那帮一起吃便当的人,我总忍不住感慨一句 什么时候能再围坐一张小桌一起吃便当,该多好。 他们会 切 一声,继而拖我进酒店,进歌房,外加一句 你怎么还这么怀旧啊?都什么年代了。 啊?是吧!此时我哪敢说,甚至在梦里,也在不断怀旧那段光景。 (二) 小个子,瓜子脸,虎牙,酒窝,我的启蒙老师。 她,说话温柔,会剪很多漂亮的小红花,会弹那种边踩边弹的风琴,会唱很多好听的儿歌,她是女神,我们所有人心目中的女神。那时候想,长大后,也要和她一样好看,一样会弹琴、会唱歌和剪小红花。十几年后的某天下午,在公车上与她相逢,一样的容颜并未受到岁月的风化,只是多了略显生疏和客套的语气,可能从来是那样,只是我变了,可能从来不是那样,后来她变了,也只是可能。 她盯住我的眼睛,努力在记忆里找寻相对应的名字,我笑,怪不得她,十几年的光华,我不再是梳着羊角辫的孩子,可出乎意料的是她还是念出了我那普通到不行的名字。后在微博上,我感慨万分,抑制不住激动和得意的心情,十几年了,实在不知道自己还有多少个十年来品味之前的光阴。将她让到了我的座位上,母亲赞许的目光,我了然她的心情,母亲向来以传统的方式和严肃的家教来培养我这个不算乖巧的 假小子 ,家境算不得富庶,却始终让我接受最好的教育。 那个夏日的午后,雨大得紧,连路旁的小草都已抬不起头,被雨打得歪斜了身子,我坐在老师的后座,要去作人生第一次演讲,那年,才六岁。远原始的交通工具,是一辆老式的女式脚踏车,老师用雨衣裹着我瘦小的身躯,就剩下两只眼睛骨碌碌地打着转,老师: 不要害怕,到时老师就坐在下面看你。 我点头应允,心想,在我们班的小朋友面前我都不害怕,其他人面前也是一样的。白色的衬衣,翻领上绣着粉色的小花,浅绿色的叶子,褶皱的蕾丝短裙,带着老师的嘱咐和小朋友的寄托,我站在台中央,面对黑压压的人群,突然觉着嗓子紧了,呼吸不顺畅了。两只小手不断地搓着衣角,紧张得不知所措,任凭老师怎么鼓励的眼神,任凭观众一次次支持的掌声,我的第一次就在这么狼狈的情景下画上句点。坐在位子上,我听不到任何的声音,看不到任何的人。 还是得了奖,鼓励奖,几包陈皮话梅,几本写字本。每每忆起这段,母亲总是欲言又止,只感慨老师对我的疼爱, 其实小黄老师早就知道你会怯场,可还是冒雨带你去比赛了。 我点头,了然在心,而今的我自然已不会怯场,在讲台上能收放自如,只是那一次机会,那一次失败,怕是这一生的最初和财富了。 小时候地调皮捣蛋是出了名的,踩坏庄稼独独是因为害怕大马路上的卡车,将药片研磨成粉状混入水中喂给鸡鸭,把小木板当成小船在水沟里飘,想踩上去当滑板,结果跌入水中全身湿透,母亲向来是 纵容 孩子的天性的,只要不是很离谱,换身衣服洗个澡也就权作没事发生过了。只是,父亲会板起脸, 一个小女孩子,这么野,是要闯祸的。 语气里却满是慈爱,我也就不惧怕了。结果,真闯祸了,又一次把人家的庄稼给踩了,老师罚我们站在教室门后的角落里,自然不止我一个,因而四个角落都被填充了,显得越发和谐,面对壁角,竟觉着极为好笑,因而忍不住 哈哈 。老师已站在背后, 很好笑吗? 我想止住笑声的,可怎么都收不住,愈发笑得离谱,结果又多罚站了一节课。 而后的几天,乖了不少,上课也很安静,老师好几次都来问我是否生病了,是否哪里不舒服,我眨巴着眼睛说 没有 ,老师还是不放心,竟放学后拉住来接我的母亲,唠叨半天,意思是我肯定有问题了,这几日都没声响了,母亲回家便仔细盘问我。这是怎么的?我好了倒觉着我不正常了?而今, 淑女 之类的词与我总画不上等号,想来是有历史渊源的。 (三) 七岁,白底红裙,有鞋印。 由于个子矮小,我总坐第一桌,同桌是个男生,黑黑的皮肤,小个子,轮廓不鲜明,倒像是个番薯(呵呵,绝无任何嘲讽的意味,只觉着此等比喻来得极为有趣、也让人欢欣)。那时的位子是一条长凳,若是一个人想起身而不告知另一人,坐得过于外侧的话是极容易 翻船 的,对于 番薯 倒没有很深刻的印象,只记得后桌的 坏小子 。 那天我的白底红花的裙子,有着美丽的弧度和褶皱,老师点名到我回答问题,竟被那小子踩住,怎么都站不起来,当时那个尴尬可想而知。十几年后的今天,与他提起这段过往,他笑言; 不会吧?十几年的事了,你还记得啊? 看着照片上的他,容颜未改,似乎并无很大出入,可我,早已面目全非了,所谓的 女大十八变 ,许是如此吧。 很想提的一个人便是诗惠,每天来找我一起去上学,等我放学,一起跳橡皮筋,一起踢毽子,抄作业(呵呵,小时候就已经不学好了,居然长大了还能学好,真是难得的)。那时的我们一路奔跑着回来,弄得满身臭汗,采路边的野花,踏着泥泞的日子,我总不断地在怀念,直至今日。很多之后的同学都猜想着小时候的我该是乖巧、懂事的,事实恰恰相反。而今的她已有自己爱的人,自己的事业,自己的追求,浓艳的妆容刹那间的错觉,我觉着那不是她,可那还是她啊。 前阵子参加她的婚礼,那样平凡、简单,却异常温馨,人生,能遇得一个值得你托付终生、踏上红毯的人,我以为是种莫大的福分和缘分。求不到,只能遇。或许他是不完美的,可是她爱,或许他是不优秀的,可是她爱,或许他是不温暖的,可是她爱。满心祝福,心里却不断慨叹时间的仓促,昨日还在眼前,今时已不同。 (四) 转学了,在三年级的时候。 遇到了那个常常被外婆提起的女孩子,开始了一段之后一直被津津乐道的友情的典范。相差一天的出生,确定了我是 姐姐 的身份,外婆说过 你是姐姐,凡事多得让着她些。 欢欣之极,终于可以摆出 姐姐 的身姿,来关心和爱护一个人。清秀的脸庞,有神的眼睛,她长得很好看,笑起来更好看,暂且称她为 可心 ,我们一见面,互道姓名便拉起手做了好朋友,那是种默契,和谐得有些让人诧异。 每次放学,喜欢先去她家,一起写作业,然后一起玩,才恋恋不舍地回家,外婆知道我在她家,自然是放心得很。她的字写得非常漂亮,相较于我的 龟爬字 实在是让人自惭形秽的。在可心家屋后,有个小菜园,那里有草莓和其他瓜果蔬菜,还有鸡冠花和一串红,尤其是那些匍匐在地的红红的、可爱的小草莓,教人真是垂涎三尺。一次,可心与我、诗惠一同野炊,捣鼓了半天,被烟熏得泪流满面,诗惠倒是心灵手巧,于是乎,我与可心便乐得清闲了,与可心奶奶一起准备碗碟、纸巾,就等着 大餐 上桌啦。那时的杯子极为老式,印着红红的喜字,玻璃材质的,纸巾也是带着花纹边地,比起现在很多的 清风 知音 来得更为厚实和精致。 到正式开吃的时候,我与可心张牙舞爪的样子怕是吓坏了一旁的诗惠,一盘红烧土豆,成了我们的囊中之物,抢着盘子的感觉而今都回味无穷,那是美味。后来每每相聚,忆起往事的时候总会讲起那盘红烧土豆,或者它并没有那么美味,只是我们抢着抢着便觉着那是珍品了。只是时间过于仓促,还未感知,便到了分别的十字路口。 我有时候会想着往事,抬起头,抑制悲伤的情绪,深吸一口气,说: 成长的必然过程,何苦求那么完满的结果,只记下这段,祝福对方还不够吗? 一次见面,一个拥抱都变得奢侈,手拉手不肯放,那年的天依旧在我头上方,风,还在呼啸,各自走进了各自的班级,而后的几年,都是一段空白,寄给过她一张卡片,却也终究是苍白无力,而后便是零八年末的再遇了,我等下再提。 (五) 那段记忆一直是恍惚的,不清晰的。 如同被面纱遮着的神秘女子,视力不好,加上班级光线问题,黑板不大,老师的字太小,我总看得好吃力,那带着霉味和夏日闷人、燥热的空气,我至今都闻得到。第二桌,第四组,靠墙,靠难窗,唯一至今还被我记得深刻的位子,同桌是个男生,有些固执和小心眼,一旦听写词语总要把自己的本子捂得严严实实,生怕别人看到似的。前不久,我去一些小学考察,发现很多孩子都有这股 小心眼 ,我淡淡的笑,孩子的天性本就是如此的,这无关孩子的品质是好或不好。 后桌的女生视力很好,她的善意抚慰了一个孩子无助茫然的心。老师是个中年男子,多才多艺,细声细语,文学和音乐的造诣都是不容小觑的,我的第一篇文学作品便是在他的指导下完成的。那日整理书橱,翻出那份手稿,觉着相当做作,空谈特谈,虽时至今日亦未全改了这份 空 ,因而忍不住发笑。他,同样姓 黄 ,与我那启蒙老师一样。 认识一位学识、品德都兼佳的女孩子,且称 佳佳 ,她能时不时吟上几句名人的话,或诗歌,或名言,总之条条框框,相当工整。那是 才女 的气息,我而今终于找到这么个词藻来阐述。而那时的我,除了疯,除了玩,似乎并无任何 乖巧女孩子 该有的长处。于是,对她的钦佩,自然是出自内心的,近朱者赤,我的文化小素养,竟也日趋成长。 那时的午餐是在教室解决的,上午的最后一节课,黄老师都会在教室后面的桌子上分菜,然后下课铃声一响起,我们便蜂拥着去挑选。再回到前排,讲台边,打饭,舀汤,老师则要么坐在讲台上,要么坐在第一组靠窗的位子上陪我们一起午餐。他的工作儒雅得好似女子,那真是一位儒雅的男子。那种温馨的感觉是之后大学里我都未曾体会过的,而那时最大的梦想却是 去大学 ,我突然笑了,为这些年来的梦想,为这些年来的追求,也为这些年来到头来的感慨。 (六) 这段回忆录里,他,终究是逃不掉的一笔。 不逃了。很多人在那时,之后,现在,都问起我与他的种种经过和结果,我答不上来,无形中的相连是教人不安的。只能说,他很好,在那段朦胧、羞涩和懵懂的时光里,给了我最完整和最完满的灵魂。只能说,我很无力,不能想什么结局,故事本身便是一种回忆,如果故事有了结局,那么回忆也会终止。只能说,舍不得,因而让回忆延续。 (七) 初中。三年。 现在看来只是一霎,可身处那段时间,还是相当漫长的。炎炎夏日,大汗淋漓,雨天雨点打在脸上,鼻梁上,手臂上,额头上,生疼,湿了裤脚,衣服上沾上脏的小东西,额前的头发扭捏成一团,都是极为让人讨厌的事情。 不久前,初中的几个老同学聚会,说起那时的我,都以为是安静、可人的孩子,乖乖的,标准的好学生,也有的说那会我便 伶牙俐齿 了,已不肯饶人了。 也许真是年少轻狂了 ,我企图一笔带过,怎奈他们回味得不亦乐乎,也不忍抚了那些记忆中的欢声笑语。虚荣,在一定程度上可以带给你莫大的欢欣,好一阵,而那个年纪,我们,似乎都已懂得它。 兰心慧质,那是我的恩师。优雅、端庄、娴静的女子,走路永远都是直着背的,一条直线,诗惠曾不止一次地告诉我 你老师好有气质的。 我认同,笑得欢欣。多年后的今天,她已为人母,身材走了样,面容也变了许多,只是还是很想依偎在她身边的心情,没有改变。那日,她将相机递给自己的先生,一定要与我合影一张,我极其难得的一次配合。 一个男生的名字,一种女生的温柔,相遇 晓伟 ,我的生活变得井井有条,不再孤独,没有寂寞,她总牵着我的手。某晚,与她在网络上相遇,谈及我正在写这段文字,她满心期待请求我一定要让她先睹为快,答应的同时我亦请多给时间予我。初为人母的她,一定有我体会不到的快乐和忧伤,有时候,会想到这么一副画面:和她重逢在风和日丽的午后,孩子甜甜的一声 阿姨 ,不知道那时的自己会有怎样的心情。也许是惊奇的,也许是喜出望外的,也或许是感慨万千的。知道她的先生很疼惜她,我满心祝福,一个女人,最终的归宿,难道不是这样吗? 我曾有过多的理想、追求和对未来的规划,但介于我是父母的女儿,总难免受着责任的牵绊,感念于他们的含辛茹苦,单就一份养育之恩,实在已是偿还不清了,我不愿折腾自己,更不愿意折腾深爱自己的人们,因而平和。 总觉着那时的自己有些稀里糊涂,对朋友是,对老师亦是。科学课代表,认识殷老师,年轻、亲切好似哥哥,谦恭、儒雅,极为温顺。听同学提起,班主任曾不只一次提出撤了我的 小官职 ,缘于我那实在难等大雅之堂的 成绩 ,他却极力反对,说认定我这个 形象代言人 了。而今我也已为人师,自然知道那是对学生自尊心和自信心莫大的关怀和爱护。那张毕业的留影还在我的影集里,那张清秀的脸庞每每都触动我敏感的神经,辗转多年,他后至云南大学深造,之后便没了音讯。同学说他也找过我,并留下电话要我联系,可事情往往这么戏剧化,我竟弄丢了号码,之后便搁置,再也没有联系。 只是,他以温柔的方式呵护了一个孩子高傲、顽劣的心。我而今才知。 (八) 中考,一个据说是转折点的驿站。 看着重点班的学生一日日消瘦,总觉着我们这帮人有些格格不入,甚至有些龌龊,你看那勤于跑小店的劲头,慵懒的午睡,美梦加口水搅拌的糜烂气息。只怕我是更离谱,连跑小店的劲头都省略了,坐着等就行了。 基于一个莫名其妙的梦,进了那所 年轻 的高中,不优秀,但却给了我很难忘的三年光景。至今,求学路上,人生途中,最跌宕的一段记忆,便是它了。就如同小学毕业时,越是重要的人越是不想去记得,因而只字片语都不曾留下,唯有记忆里的笑颜,每每忆起,是感恩的知足。总觉着自己是说不出可以教人放心、宽慰的话的,因而,不说,只淡淡的笑,也好,心绪的宁静,之后,终于被时间治愈的很好,那些心事,都好似加了秤砣的蛇皮袋,灌满泥沙,而后被沉入湖底。好似睡着了的美人鱼,别轻易去唤醒她,因为她会吃了你,不吐出骨头,甚至带走你的灵魂。 那年,希望自己不反感于现实的种种赤裸裸的关系,也不批判,能静静地看,可是,眼里,终究一直带着泪。 (九) 年华没打上烙印,是我束缚了自己。 百分之十的客观现实改变不了,百分之九十的心态却是自己的,幸福、快乐本身很简单,只是追求的人复杂了。 有人说,看我的文字会悲伤,实在不是我初衷。本身很渴求自由与快乐,自然不希望任何人不自由,不快乐,也许这话有些搪塞,因缘若是出自我的笔下,这番解说自是难免的。或为自己开脱,或为文字开脱。某日,发现囊中实在羞涩,于是大肆叫嚷:谁要我的文字?卖了去!虽不称斤称两,倒也衡量一番,终究卖不得个高价,源于没有 红印章 ,不过够几顿温饱,已然阿弥陀佛。 (十) 中考结束后的暑假,炎热,烦躁。 躲在家里不肯出门,无所事事的感觉让人有些浑身不自在。接到陌生的电话,陌生的号码、声音,却了然于我的很多事情,好奇,多少会有。可我终究不是个会将 好奇 和其他放大的人,因为不问,任由它不了了之。或者,他出现在我的视线范围内,或者他只是在哪里与我有过一面之缘,不加考证。 他,如同夏日里的一抹清凉,从不越雷池半步,谦恭有加,而我们的话题也似乎磊落的很,不阴暗,不负面,更加不暧昧不清。有时候会想:也许可以见一面的,看看他的样貌,感受下他的气息,可是终究作罢。因为不忍打破这样的宁静。而今,我能记忆的关于他的部分实在太少,或许这么多年,他早已是孩子的父亲,女人的丈夫,而那些朦胧的美好的年少时的光阴,都被岁月埋在了这座城里。 (十一) 填饱志愿,我有个民主的家庭。 每个父母似乎都希望孩子上重点,重点班,重点高中,重点大学,那么,那些非重点该如何是好呢。我曾想。本身不是重点的人,也或许是害怕竞争,因为不想,也因为无用,我以一分之差跌下重点线。父母一脸诧异,甚至以为我是故意考砸。天知道我并没有那么聪明,也并没有那么傻。 与高中母校的渊源首先来自一个莫名其妙的梦。梦里的我清晰地走过每个角落,校园里的一花一木都好似熟悉的朋友,相见、重逢,可事实是我并未到过。于是,义无反顾地填了她的名字。当然,这中间与父母的体谅和支持有着莫大的关联,或者完全可以去走些捷径进所谓的重点,但他们最终还是尊重了我。这是多年后,我每每想到,倍感安慰和欣喜的事情。 赞 (散文编辑:江南风) 我家微信时代的年三十 前年,公公过生日时曾准备给他买个智能手机,主要目的是想教他们玩玩微信,也好让他们… 国版《解忧杂货店》观后感 每个人都是靠着自己的努力,才走向了更好的人生。 咨询信的答案,只是在鼓励一颗已有… 一个基督徒的情感日记(2018年1月14号) 2018年1月14号: 今天,吴江的气温比较温暖,不似前几天那般寒冷。昨天与今天,吴江的… 做个不停止成长的人 莉莉老师上瑜伽课时带着浓重的鼻音不停咳嗽着。可能不舒服,她今天示范动作少了很多,… 一个基督徒的情感日记(2018年1月13号) 2018年1月13号: 昨天,姐姐和外甥小大卫并没有过来我和母亲暂住的金家坝东湾村这里,… 一个基督徒的情感日记(2018年1月12号) 2018年1月12号: 前天的时候,我说:“母亲明天去昆山。”然而昨天,母亲并没有去昆山…

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Ftmiiedrr

Withered

The night is very deep and quiet. Sitting alone in front of the computer, the wall clock on the wall was ringing ceaselessly, beating the memory window of life relentlessly and shedding gray dust all over the floor. Open the thick diary, a piece of heart leaves slide down from the White Paper and black words, like leaves falling on the ground in autumn waiting for the comfort of collecting. The heart is the lamp in the dark, the wind is the song in silence, the creeping heart leaves roll on the horizon, and the thoughts which affect the heartache are as long as the silk of Spring Silkworms, which are continuous, but they are so long endlessly, wrapped around apical. In this silent night, listening to the tick, I climbed over the lost ups and downs page by page. Maybe in the sunny morning of the next day, seeing a couple of lovers walking towards the green lawn hand in hand, I thought of her silently in my heart, but I was no longer in sight. Occasionally she dreamed about her back in the middle of the night, and the Heart leaf in her chest would jump up inexplicably, but it really didn’t matter. Tonight, the wound under the dust of the heart leaves is unwilling to be silent when it is lonely. It always knocks through the door of memory stubbornly to find the nutrient moistened by the withered heart leaves. Too much pain has already made it exhausted. Along the sunny path that I once walked, I saw the familiar face at the other end of the road, and then I realized that it was because of the deep pain, everything has been carved on the leaves of the heart, destined to remember the day when life was lost. [Editor in charge: Ke Er] Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Azpuxiuy

A ray of sunshine

Today, the difficult sun came out. I moved out a rocking chair from home and sat lazily in the Open Space Mountain, with my face facing the sun. I closed my eyes and relaxed myself, enjoying the warmth the sun gave me completely, then he opened his eyes and stretched his hands to the Sun, hoping to make his hands so warm. The sun was so big that it could not shine dazzling light. Then grandma came out. She told me not to bask in so much sun, but to sit on the stone bench under the tree. However, I didn’t agree, and the sun that came out finally would never be let go, on such a cold day, I should cherish the golden light well. Besides, it may not come out tomorrow! The sun shining on the Earth and warming the Earth is an indispensable part of the growth of all things. Like (prose editor: Yue ran) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Cduchha

Duckweed

At that dusk, we sat on the top of the teaching building, silent for a long time, with a huge sunset in front of us, warm and sad. Just a few words, it just lingered between my teeth, and I never had the courage to speak it out. At the end of the season, the falling maple leaves are like missing. It turns out that you are joking. I take it seriously. Maybe I have to leave a little, it is good to go to the end of the world, do you want to leave? Later, you left. Just like Xu Zhimo waving his sleeves, he didn’t take away a piece of cloud. After I cried, my years folded slowly. After you came here, you took a look and walked away again. So, I was recalling the long night, recalling those too many days, the change of leaving, there were too many days, the days with too many bruises all over the body, just a few words that the past took time out of my only warmth, those tossing and turning dreams have never been realized, how to give up naturally! So, I used to wake up in the dark night, no one comforted me, and tried my best to get rid of it. Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Wiohwazw

Essays

When the sun was about to fall from behind, I stood with a glow. Standing on this dusk campus. In the dusk campus, there were many crowds. I suddenly wanted to think deeply, the world and myself. Today, it slipped inexplicably. Slide over, leaving no trace of my change. What did you have and what did you lose? Want to understand… what is the meaning of this life? I want to understand… what am I doing? Want to understand… want to understand, want to know, what happened before tomorrow? Will tomorrow simply be the continuation of today. Or, what should I do? I don’t know …… so, time ~ seems to become a drop of light. Falling… falling… into nothingness. It is easy to hear people say that they are growing up, right. Growing up, right? Growing up, but growing up. What does growing up mean, maturity? Or …… maybe, I just feel that there are more stories of my own that can be stated. There are more memories to recall, sad, happy, all good. In that way, there will be less loneliness. In the vast sea of people, in the boundless time wilderness. Met. I met a lot, just like filling the blank with stories. However, what we often see is the past, in our hearts. What I am talking about is just the back of the past. As for the next second world, I am totally ignorant. Sometimes, I am at a loss. As for the future, it is more difficult to understand, so it doesn’t matter. Yes, I exist. Indeed of alive. However, what kind of me I am? I have a pair of eyes and can see everything in the world. I have a pair of ears, listening to the endless dust. I have a heart, and I am constantly Understanding sadness and happiness. I keep chasing for the happiness in my heart. But, why? I am often confused, just like the despair of hesitating on the cliff. In a hurry, I was busy somehow until I was tired. Is it true that I live to be busy? Otherwise, how can I explain it. Gradually, time slipped away in the gap. Gradually, there was a day after day in my consciousness, a month, a year. Gradually, all the people around me changed and became strange. But has it really changed? The reason why we have never stood in the same space has changed. Because we have experienced too much. But for nature, nothing has changed. Da Xu, this is life. But I still don’t understand the reincarnation of such life. For what kind of continuation. As for life, I am willing to fall. As for falling, I don’t know why. When I appeared one day, I became a piece of leaves floating in the whirlpool of life. I began to think whether I should. We should give up thinking. Maybe everything is empty. All is nothingness. [Editor in charge: Man Tree]] Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…

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Ftmiiedrr

Path

In the cold night, there were few pedestrians on the path, and the path under the light was long and secluded, with a little bitter feeling. I took a slow step, hiding my missing and enlarging my peace at the same time, and acquiesced that my emotion was growing infinitely. The footsteps seem to step on my ups and downs of heart, and I can’t tell whether it is the sound of footsteps or the sound of heartbeat. On the emotional road of soul, you accompany me through a period of time, leaving a wonderful memory. There is no need to ask yourself whether you like it or not, let alone whether you will disappoint me. On the path tonight, everything remains the same as last year. My shadow is moving slowly. Under the cold night sky, I want to pick up the emotion that I traveled last year, look for your dense thoughts carefully and listen to your heartbeat quietly. I gently held out my soul, looked at the lamp quietly, and cleared up the past events one by one. Although it was a little cold tonight, I still opened my heart fearlessly with my hands, only to let my soul sing gently in the secluded night. Singing the moment glory of my acquaintance with you, singing the fate without regret, I found the light of words in the edge of fate, feeling the dream and thoughts flying together, it adds a happy mood to myself. Like (prose editor: Jiangnan wind) the 30th year of my WeChat era The year before last, my eunuch planned to buy a smartphone for him on his birthday. The main purpose was to teach them how to play WeChat, and let them… Comments on the Chinese version of “worry-free grocery store” Everyone moves towards a better life through his own efforts. The answer to the consultation letter is just encouraging an existing… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 14, 2018) January 14, 2018: Today, the temperature in Wujiang is relatively warm, not as cold as a few days ago. Yesterday and Today, Wu Jiang’s… Be a person who never stops growing up Teacher Lily coughed with a strong nasal tone when she was in yoga class. Maybe it’s uncomfortable, she has less demonstration action today,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 13, 2018) January 13, 2018: Yesterday, my sister and nephew Little David didn’t come to the Dongwan village of jinjiaba where my mother and I stayed temporarily,… An emotional diary of a Christian (January 12, 2018) January 12, 2018: The day before yesterday, I said, “my mother will go to Kunshan tomorrow.” However, yesterday, my mother did not go to Kunshan…