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I read a sentence in a magazine: there are always some irreparable but helpless mistakes in life, which happen suddenly, making people face the gap and admit that they can’t do anything. There were not many people on the upstairs floor where I lived, and because of the Qingming Festival, there were even fewer people. Qingming Festival is a day of nostalgia. It does not mean that 365 days and nights a year are missed only on this day. It’s just that Qingming Festival is more suitable for missing. There are only a few people in the world who can say to them, “I love, I want to hug, I want to be coaxed and spoiled, and I can naturally ask for unconditional love. I thought I could keep begging her. It was not until that day that I received a call from my second aunt: Sister, tell you, don’t be sad or cry. Grandma went there. I always thought that death was a very distant thing from I am. It seemed that the distant thing would never happen around me. So I never thought about this. When I received a call from my second aunt, my heart sank and my tears fell down immediately. I realized in a daze that it was so easy to die. Maybe only by experiencing the pain of losing people around you can you truly understand that feeling. They are different from each other, and life and death are separated. I think it’s really painful. So I dare not think about it, but my heart is still painful and sad! Breathing is very difficult, with tears all over my face. When I went home on holiday, I saw the house my grandmother had lived in before was beyond recognition, and my heart was full of pain. Here, have you ever lived in someone who loves me so much? Is she really gone? However, really, after everything happened and after thinking about it, everything was no longer the same as before. In this day when I could put aside everything and miss it recklessly, my heart was a little numb. I couldn’t get into the real mourning mood. I was a little at a loss, I feel as if I am in the void, unable to grasp a little truth. I began to recall that time began to retreat fragment 1: Sister a month before grandma left, why did she call me today? My cousin seems a little surprised. Grandma is ill, is it very serious? It is very powerful, but I got up today, you wait, I will call her to answer the phone. Ya, when will I come back? I want to see you. There came grandma’s trembling voice, and I sobbed. Grandma and grandma, are you feeling better? I’m fine, don’t worry. It’s cold, let my cousin take you to bask in the sun. Old, don’t want to move, I don’t know if I can see you again. Yes, I will have a holiday soon. I will accompany you every day when I come back. I am afraid that I can’t do it, alas, I can’t help myself when I am old. I cried out of control: Grandma, I want you to live well, don’t die, don’t say unlucky words. I was like a frightened bird with extremely unstable mood, which not only scared my roommate, but also scared my grandmother. She was just like the old days before, ya, don’t cry, ya, so good, Grandma, die. Grandma, you promised me, but no matter how overbearing I was, you finally gave up your promise to me once, and it was the only time. Just leave me in front of your grave, looking into the sky with tears. Fragment 2. Grandma, the last day of summer vacation, I will go back to school tomorrow. I’m leaving again, so fast. Next time I come back, I will live in a new house. By then, I will be closer to you. I will take you to the top of my house to bask in the sun every day. Next time, bring a boyfriend back, let me see, I want to know who took me away. OK, I’m going to have a boyfriend, the first one to show you. Grandma turned her face and looked at me kindly. The faint smile on her face was so warm. Grandma, don’t stay in the house all day long. Go out for a walk more and exercise your body well. When I earn money, I will take you outside to play. Good, ah, so filial, grandma laughed happily like a child. It was a pity that all the agreements were empty. It seemed that I could still hear the warm laughter that afternoon. Turning around, I felt dejected. Fragment III. Fragment IV my mind was in a mess. It was the first time that I carried my schoolbag, changed my teeth, fought with someone for the first time, and my grandmother was beside me for the first time. It turned out that in my life, Grandma penetrated so deeply, so widely and everywhere. But it is such a person who is far away from me now. I haven’t had time to do anything, such as: bring a boyfriend to show her, and let her put my hand in another person’s hand; or, take her to the place where she had been when she was young, which made her not only fascinated in her memory; Or she also paid homage and made a vow in front of the Buddha together. Grandma believed in the Buddha so much, but I haven’t been with her once. If I had known this, I would have promised devoutly in front of the Buddha: I want my grandmother to accompany me for a long time, but I will never have this chance. In tears, when I saw my grandmother coming towards me, I still said: Ya, don’t cry; Ya, how lovely!

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